‘Children are known by the way they act.’ Proverbs 20:11 NLT
When you see signs of adolescence in your child, it’s time to talk with them. As the parent of a preteen, your task is similar to that of a football coach who’s trained his squad all through the late summer and early autumn. Now the first game is about to occur, when direct coaching is not going to be possible. So the coach gathers the players in the dressing room and makes one last speech before they take the field. He reminds them again of the fundamentals of the game, and gives them the old pep talk about winning.
Similarly, as the parent of a preteen you’ve been teaching them through preschool and primary school years about right and wrong, what to believe, and how to behave. Now the big contest called adolescence is about to begin and your team will take the field. From that point forward, very little parental advice can be given.
A Christian psychologist recommends that parents take an eleven- or twelve-year-old child on a ‘preparing for adolescence’ trip, during which moral values and family principles are repeated and emphasised: sex education and the physical changes of adolescence, the approaching social pressures, and other fundamentals that should be discussed. When you’ve done this, you’ve two things left to do: (1) Assure them you love them and will always be there for them, and that will never change. (2) Pray for them every day. And don’t just pray, have confidence in the power of your prayers: ‘The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.’ (James 5:16 NLT)